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Friday, December 28, 2012

My Most Read Posts

These are all from 2011!!  Why was I so much better at this in 2011??  Anywho..EnJoY!  Some will make you laugh out loud, some are serious, but all have drawn quite an audience.  Tell me which is your favorite!  Comment below!

10.  Heroes   A tribute to our military

9.  Quiet Time  The time I escaped :D

8.  Welcome Back  A teacher's reflection of the first day of school...God help me!

7.  More Bang For Your Buck  For all you cheap skates out there!

6.  Marriage 101  Note:  I'm not nearly as sociable as I once was either as stated in this post :(

5.  Blessings One of my personal faves

4.  Summer Vacation, Day Three  Summertime and a drama queen!

3.  Teacher Tip: Getting That Dang Straw in the Capri Sun is a Skill My BEST teacher advice ever!

2.  My First Born  The story of 9/11/01, the day my world and your world changed.

1.  She's Crazy I Tell You!  Hilarious...about my mom and every grandmother on the planet!

Thanks for the Ammo, Santa!

Well, as NORAD Santa Tracker predicted, Santa Claus made his appearance around 11:15 p.m. on the night of Christmas Eve just as soon as the kids were asleep (or at least faking sleep well enough for Santa to begin).
This year proved to be just the same as any other.  One kid had too much, one kid had way too little, and one kid had it just as originally planned.  The lack of communication in this house caused us to spend $$$hundreds$$$ more on Christmas than we originally intended.  I blame Mr. Zembower since he just had to have the new gun for his sweet male offspring.  Our middle child scored big with a new TV for her room so that they finally quit fighting daily over Zac's TV.  She was thrilled.  Our youngest scored what was left on the shelves the day before Christmas Eve.  She's only five and still easy to please, though ((and there were no more KAROAKE machines left in this town!!!)).  Their family time for Christmas also proved prolific in the gift department.
Now, as the holiday winds down, we are getting back into our normal swing of things.  I am doing what any good mom does, using these new possessions as ammo.  ((Don't judge.  You know you do it, too))
 My middle child is losing things left and right.  I've checked her "clean" room three times already.  I've written of her housekeeping abilities before in this post about chores and this follow up post.  She's a disaster.  Picture the child of Pigpen and the Tasmanian Devil.  If she touches it, it remains where she left it...all over my house.  When asked if she cleaned her room, brushed her teeth, took a shower, etc, she responds with a fully believable, "Yes."   Lies...all of them.  It's time for action.  No matter what I am doing, how busy I think I am, I will have to go to her task and double check.  I've started this today.  She was told that each time I checked and she had lied, she would lose a new beloved item.  So far, she's lost her TV and her new Heeleys on my only two checks.  Next is the Nook, then the football.  I will WIN...I will be VICTORIOUS!!  I WILL have a home that I can actually have surprise guests one day without being utterly embarrassed at the state of disarray that our home is in!

Lesson:  The middle child is a tough nut to crack.

In other news, Santa has since found two more bags of gifts (mostly clothing) in the bag of her his sleigh.  I also blame this on Mr. Zembower since he was the one designated to retrieve said items from the back of the sleigh at 11:00 pm on Christmas Eve.  :(


One more note to defend my grammatical intelligence.  This font apparently makes my uppercase S look like a lowercase S in my title on the word "Santa".  I assure you, I have checked and rechecked, and I definitely put an uppercase letter there.  :(

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

A to Z: Life is a Lesson: Ma'am I Think You're On Our Team

A to Z: Life is a Lesson: Ma'am I Think You're On Our Team: It has taken me over 2 weeks to admit this to anyone, even my husband.  Actually, I haven't even told him yet.  Once you read this, erase it...

Ma'am I Think You're On Our Team

It has taken me over 2 weeks to admit this to anyone, even my husband.  Actually, I haven't even told him yet.  Once you read this, erase it from your brain.  You are not allowed to question me or ever bring it up again.

Basketball season has begun.  Once again, Catie was ready to try out for another sport.  T-ball was short-lived, having spent most of the time faking a headache or tummy ache, then bouncing back for the post game high fives and popsicles.  Zac and Abby play ((and L-O-V-E)) basketball, so Catie must at least give it a go.  If she takes after me, basketball will NOT be her thang.

Well, for the first practice, we arrived to find a school friend on the team.  I thought, "I don't remember seeing a school friend on the roster?"  I dismissed it and thought he must have signed up late.  I sent Catie to the coach on Court 2, watched him check to see if he had her name, and stayed for her practice.  Truth be told, I usually walked the overhead track and watched simultaneously, stopping at the rare occasion that it was Catie's turn to shoot, giving a quick thumbs up, and continuing on.  That's what Moms of the Year do, right?  We were on time, even early for practices.  We practiced like champs for 3 solid weeks.

At the end of the 3rd practice, just as Catie was getting the hang of actually reaching the goal with the ball and really enjoying her brand new teammates,  the Family Life Center Director approached me and said, "Um, we don't have a uniform for Catie on this team, but that team does."  She pointed to the team we had practiced next to for 3 solid weeks...on Court 1.  The team with a lot of short people, a.k.a. 4-year-olds.

"Is there any chance we can just play with this team?"
"No.  The teams are full, sorry."
"And you think they'd notice?"
"Yea.  The teams are all full."

I stood in the middle of the court staring at Catie frolicking with her new buds on her team, dreading having to break the news.  I lied and told her this new team was so much better and practiced much better than hers.  It would be so much fun.  She didn't buy it.  There was one sweet girl on the team, which was a plus (who has not attended a practice or game since that day).  We finished up practice with our "new" team long enough to get the last minute "1-2-3 Hornets!" huddle at the end.

So there it is.  We currently practice with the Hornets on Court 1...with the short kids.  Games are at the crack of dawn each Saturday.  Catie's 5-year-old maturity combined with her mad dribbling skills have proven an asset to her new team.  Sure, most of practice is spent with half of the team on their backs while spinning in circles, the other half sipping their apple juice, but it has been fun.  She really does have great coaches.  Last game, one of them pulled me aside and said, "I am just so proud of Catie!  She is so shy and quiet, but she got out there and really gave it her all today."  Shy and quiet....sure...and I'm Jennifer Lopez.

Lesson:  Pay attention, Mom-of-the-Year.


Friday, December 7, 2012

Free Christmas Tree!!

Last week my aunt said she knew someone giving away a NINE foot artificial tree.  The cheapskate deal seeker that I am jumped on the deal, since I have been meaning to buy a fake tree for years.  When I asked what was wrong with it, she said, "It was in perfect condition.  The man and lady are just getting older and don't want the pain of such a large tree."  ScoRe!!

Well, the tree is now up.  It is quite lovely with the exception of one major detail.  The former smell of Christmas that emanated the air is no longer there.  It has been replaced with this smell.  The smell of a fake tree...that sat in the attic for month after month...the attic of old people...the attic that also housed MoTh BaLLs!! 

Who uses moth balls??  There has to be another way to protect the treasures you keep. 

Anyway...the smell.  You know the one, with the live tree...the pine, the fresh smell of the wood, and the sap.  I didn't realize how much I enjoyed it.  Now it's gone.

It's okay.  I am a teacher.  I am completely armed with every Yuletide flavor of candle you can imagine from years and years of thoughtful Christmas gifts.  I could try to be authentic with the smell I choose, but I am all out of "pine", and there is no "Muggy Louisiana Heat" candle on the market.  I settled for "Winter Wonderland" which could not be further from authentic, but what the heck, neither is the tree.

Lesson:  Beggars can't be choosers.

Merry Christmas