Drama Club

I can't decide where the personality of my sweet youngest daughter, Catherine Alyce, also known as Catie, comes from.  My middle child, Abby, clearly is my daughter in personality and all.  I was the painfully shy tomboy that I see when I look at her.  My son exhibits my personality when he is too indecisive.   We are unsure about the influence which created Thing 3.

Catie, hmmmm...currently (past bed time) she is doing quick claps and shimmying from side to side mimicking Michael Jackson.  Every now then, she busts into a quick rap about her socks and sandals (I think this is a Disney Channel thing).  Daily, she makes fake phone calls to order room service..."Yes, this is Catie Zembower.  I would like Honey Nut Cheerios and Cheetos and Apple Juice.  I'm going to need A LOT!  I'm SO hungry!  Thanks.  Bye." ....click..."Yes.  This is Catie Zembower.  I need a large pizza with everything on it.  Thanks. Bye." click.

She fake calls fake friends.  "Hi, this is Catie!  Are you coming over to sleep?  Okay, see you soon.  Bye"...click...."Hi.  This is Catie....ummm, I can come pick you up.  I'll come in a little bit.  Yes.  Mmhm.  Well, I drive a really big truck.  We can go to California (squealing).  My truck doesn't have seat belts either, so we don't have to buckle up!"...click.

I often have to say "Amen" to the Ritz cracker or Wheat Thin that is presented to me with a serious "The Body Of Christ".  She changes her clothes 5 times a day.  Spells things to me like, "Mom, d-a-h-f-r-g-v.  That means I love you (head tilt, smile)."  She thinks it is a cruel and unfair world when her brother and sister can have friends over and have sleepovers, but she can't. When asked who she would invite, she lists 3rd graders (Abby's friends).

She's a big faker.  Often, when we are getting out of the car, she quickly closes her eyes and pretends she's sleeping. It would benefit her if she could control her laughter when faking, but she can't.  Her eyelids flitter furiously as she tries hard to keep them closed while still making an effort to see my reaction.  Lately, she has realized that if she fake sleeps through mass, she does not have to get up and down so often.  So, immediately upon finding our seats, she goes limp in our arms, faking, faking, faking, then finally actually sleeping.

The most embarrassing so far, though, would have to be when Zac's 9-year-old visiting friend (also my 4th grade student) walked through the living room sans shirt after a stinky fishing trip on his way to the shower.  Catie whistled at him, except she can't whistle, so she faked it in a high pitched squeal.

Dear God, give me patience and guidance and the knowledge I will certainly need to steer this child in a positive, fulfilling direction.  Guide me to opportunities to help her imagination to grow.  And please, God, show me the best location in our home for her first Oscar.    Amen

~ACZ

My First Born

Sunday is my son Zac's 10th birthday.  He's growing up fast.  This year, though, I have watched this boy turn more into a young man.  This is a major year of growth.  There are a few things that have happened recently, suddenly, overnight.  A few nights ago, I was getting dinner on the table.  It suddenly felt odd to give this big kid the plastic kid plate he's eaten dinner on for years and years.  I shrugged and pulled out an actual full sized dinner plate for him.  A few weeks ago we were barbecuing.  It felt like we HAD to teach him about the barbecue pit and how to grill.  So, now he grills.  Tonight, at dinner, as I ordered drinks for everyone at a restaurant, I had to say, "Wait, instead of 3 child drinks, make that 2 child drinks and one regular."  The biggest sign of all, though, may be that this alien has suddenly chosen to shower without whining, bargaining, complaining, sometimes without even being asked!

Sunday will be 10 years since that tragic day in New York, Washington D.C., and Shanksville, Pennsylvania where thousands of innocent fathers, brothers, mothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, friends, servicemen....(((children))) lost their lives.  It was a day that our security of living in this invincible country was shaken, shattered.  We've never gained that feeling back, either.

Zac was due on September 3, 2001.  I was examined and told I had no progress, come back in a week.  I was big, fat, pregnant, dying from the heat, and extremely anxious to meet my first child.  We came back in a week.  Still no progress.  We were instructed to check into the hospital the next morning to be induced.

So, at 4:30 am Tuesday, September 11, 2001, we left for the hospital.  Around 6:00 am, I was examined again, and was told still no progress.  In fact, it seemed as though this baby was nowhere near the point for delivery.  My doctor decided to schedule a C-section feeling my labor could be long and possibly dangerous for both of us.  We would just wait in the room until the next available operating room.  So, that's what we did. 

All I could do was watch TV.  A little before 9:00 the channel was interrupted because a plane had hit the World Trade Center.  Shocked, I watched the horror of that burning building.  Actually, I assumed it was a smaller plane, and not a passenger plane.  I don't know why, but maybe I was more focused on the flames than the airplane.  The news media, of course, stayed with the story.  Suddenly, as a reporter stood in front of the flames, I watched a 2nd plane crash into the other tower {{{{silence}}}}}
Todd had been down the hall and came running into the room.  "Did you SEE THAT??!"  {{{Silence}}} This is when I realized the size and appearance of the planes.....passenger planes.  This is when the magnitude of the events struck me...TWO passenger planes don't hit buildings on accident.  Oh, and all of the people INSIDE the buildings!....oh, no. {{{Silence}}}}  I don't remember even reacting or saying a word.  I remember it all being surreal, trying to process what just happened, how many people may be killed...THIS will be my son's birthday.  This tragic day will be the day I will also have cause for celebration.  This was hard to process.  It already felt wrong to celebrate...anything at all.  My most joyous day of my entire life was immediately filled with sadness for these families who would lose loved ones on the same day I would welcome one.  The day went on with 2 more terrorist attacks at the Pentagon and in Pennsylvania.  Nurses and staff kept coming into my room, watching a bit of the news, then moving on to their next patient.  I was glued to the TV until I was wheeled into surgery.

Zac was born at 12:24 pm.  He had a head full of black hair and weighed 8 lbs., 12 oz.  He had been so high up that they literally had to push down on my belly to get him out via C-section.  (A hint of what motherhood would be like).  We were thrilled.  The rest of the world and all of its anguish disappeared for the time.  Family and friends galore came to see this blessing that had come on such a dark day.  I stayed in the hospital for 3 days.

I left the hospital on September 14th (as my cousin was being wheeled in to deliver her first as well).  I remember that when we got to the car, we had a flat tire.  Strange, I remember that now.  Normally, I guess that would be a story to tell as you leave the hospital with your first born, but it is a vague memory.  I was mesmerized at what had happened to Lafayette while I was in the hospital.  The town was painted red, white, and blue.  All cars had flags, stickers.  Businesses had their windows painted...it was crazy.  Everyone had been living with the circus of it all for these 3 days, and I had been ...absent.  I was absent for over a week more as I stayed home while I healed.  Again, when I left the house, the same patriotism could be seen everywhere.  What a time that was!  You almost felt an incredible bond with every American, like we had all been through this tragedy together. 

We visited the site of the Flight 93 crash in Shanksville, Pennsylvania about 6 years ago.  What a feeling you get being there.  It is nothing I can put into words.  It's very spiritual.  You just want to hit your knees and pray harder than you've ever prayed for peace to these victims and their families.  You want to ask God "WHY???"  over and over.

As I think back on that day, my feelings are like a roller coaster.  Every year, for Zac's birthday, I feel I cannot fully enjoy it until I give credit where credit is due.  This is Zac's birthday, but this is also the 10th year that loved ones and servicemen will be missed around the dinner table.  It's the 10th year that those families will celebrate the upcoming holidays without their family members.  It is the 10th year that our military risks everything to protect our freedom.  It's the 10th year that military families sacrifice their togetherness for us.  I cannot fully express my gratitude for any military who gave so much as a weekend dedicated to this cause.  I cannot even begin to express my sympathy for those families who lost someone in New York, D.C, or Pennsylvania.  Now, on to another bittersweet birthday.

Happy birthday, Zac.

This is Zac at age 4 in front of the shrine that has been

placed upon the fence in Shanksville, PA. 

Peace,

ACZ

"QUIET" time

So, we've been in school now for close to one month.  I am teaching my son this year (umm..that's another blog post).  My daughter, Abby (click for more),  is in 3rd grade right next door.  Sweet, precious Catie started Pre-K 4 with her beloved teachers Mrs. McIver and Mrs. Miller (along with her fauxmance, Grant).  Her classroom is also in a very close proximity to mine.  It's adorable........you'd think.  However, this ideal arrangement that I so longed for has backfired.  I have gone from having at least a few minutes of quiet as I begin my work day, to none...at all...nada...zip. 

As my precious 4th grade angels are entering my classroom, Catie, Abby, and Zac are just making their exit.  Not to mention the added drama of having your 4-year-old at work with you.  AND, as my 4th grade angels are leaving for the day, I have already had 2 booksacks, a plastic folder, several papers from school, a pair of shoes, a ponytail holder, and 2 assignment pads handed to me.  My kids are already arguing, asking for snacks, taking out markers, paper, crayons, scissors, library books, and on, and on.  This is all happening in unison with parent pick up.  I still have 8-10 students and 2 parents in the room....AAAGHGHH!

Somewhere I must draw the line, somehow.  I have to stop being Mrs. Adrienne, T H E N become "Mom".  Obviously(!!!!) since this post was supposed to be about my "quiet" run tonight, and it has viciously spiraled into the stress of my day to day.

So, I get home, and decide {{Today is the day}} I will get back into my running routine I meant to stick to weeks ago.  The air is cool, the sun is shining, there is no excuse.

quietly, I sneak into my room and change my clothes, slide into the closet and grab my running shoes, sneak past the 3 kiddies mesmerized by "So Random" on Disney (or whatever).  I gently grab the dog leash.  My trusty, faithful, needy, co-dependent, over sized dog is already by my side {{of course}}.  Ever so carefully, I click the lever on the door.  It creaks a bit as it opens, but those kids are zombies now, luckily.  I exit....free...freee....I MADE IT!!!

No, this is not me, but it is how I felt!

I made it out of the house without one mini Zembower noticing!  My music is on what I want to hear (Take Over me by Aaron Shust)  all seems to be well ......for the most part.
My dog did become obsessed with every vehicle that chose this hour to grace the neighborhood.  He lost all of his marbles when the UPS man rounded the corner, tying me into his leash, viciously causing me to spin, turn, and nearly crash into the pavement.  He even gave me the added bonus of collecting his poop in a little, black bag. 

When I finally had him calmed, I could hear the faint calling of a familiar voice.  (((Abby)))).  I should have known she would find me out <<crinkled nose>>.  I mean, Disney Channel is pretty awesome, but these kids check to make sure I am, in fact, devoting all of my love, time, and attention to their cause each and every second.  I knew she would eventually check on me, notice, and follow.  Luckily, she was the only one who discovered this opportunity.  She ran with me in her Peter Pan collared starched uniform shirt, her navy modesty shorts, her navy knee highs, and her running shoes. 

This run was a hard one.  I was out of practice.  It was a mess, but I completed it.  It was, however, my "quiet" time which never actually became very quiet at all.

Lesson:  Not so "quiet" time ain't so bad either.

How do you get YOUR much deserved quiet time??

~ACZ

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Honey Do .......pLeAsE!!

I have been in my beautiful new house for over a month now.  It is lovely and spacious and full of light.  Mostly, this is because I have been asking my husband to hang our shades since before the move.  I have asked nicely...firmly...sadly....in writing....with a please.....nagging, nagging, nagging.  You know the drill, ladies.

I think I may resort to comedy, or desperation.  I have 5 shades to hang.  I shall place one over his sink in the bathroom.  One will go on his computer in the office.  One will lay on his pillow.  One can block his way to the garage.  Where can the other go.......ahhhh, his beloved shower.

I'll let you know if this new form of nagging is a success. :/

Lesson to come.

~ACZ

Welcome Back!!

First day of school today....whew.  If you think the first day of school wipes the kids out, you should meet the teachers at the end of the day.  My legs are threatening to give out on me without any notice, my feet hurt from my shins to my pedicure deprived toes, and all I want to do is go to bed.  If anyone stops by to hand out Mom of the Year trophy today, they would probably leave laughing.
I need eggs, wheat bread, apple juice, and turkey.  It can wait.  I'll have to be creative for lunch tomorrow.  The only thing that would get me to the store would be if coffee or wine was on that list.  It is not.  I'm safe.

My kids asked for McFlurries after school.  I stopped to get those after realizing my purse was left at school and I had to go all the way back there, through road construction, and BACK to the drive thru window I HAD JUST LEFT as they snored in the backseat.  While there, I decided I may as well get dinner (since Todd is out of town on the worst night to be out of town).  We are home now.  They have just eaten their McFlurries and dinner all at the same time.  Normally, I would die before that would happen.  Not tonight.  Just give me a bed.

Currently, the only words coming out of my mouth are, "Maybe you should get ready for bed."  This would be in response to "Mom, I'm tired"; "Mom, my tummy hurts" (that's what we get for eating dessert with our fast food meal); "Mom, we are out of apple juice." ; "Mommy, Zac hit me." ; and "Mom, I need socks for tomorrow."  To ALL of this, I say, "Maybe you should just get ready for bed."

The dog is pacing since no one in this house will walk him.  My kids are arguing.  The house is a mess.  My laundry room suddenly needs attention that it will not get.  There are dishes in the sink.


.....I just want to sit......rest.....sleep.  zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Lesson learned:  I will never be fully prepared for the first day of school.


~ACZ

She's Crazy I Tell You

When I was younger, my siblings and I ate wheat bread.  We had a cereal choice of Cheerios or Golden Grahams (our whole lives).  We never had any type of soda grace our refrigerator.  We bathed nightly, brushed twice a day, went to bed on time, made our beds in the morning.  We even had the utter embarrassment of all 3 of us being dressed the same.  Often this included our matching Tshirts that said, "If You Love Me Don't Feed Me Candy".  Not only did she NEVER give us candy (unless you count the treat of sugarless gum), but she requested the same of anyone who dared look at us.  My sweet Maw Maw (whom I miss daily) always lovingly disregarded this request, took us to Jesse's Food Store, and bought us any candy we wanted.

This has all changed.  Somewhere between her own motherhood, and her acquisition of the title "Nana", she has completely lost her marbles.  The signs have been slow and subtle, like having the baby tootsie rolls for the kids whenever they wanted, then buying Pop Tarts, buying a sugary cupcake or cookie treat anytime she knows we will visit.  But today, she has crossed the line.  I feel she may require some sort of medical attention, therapy even.

We have all decided to come on a long weekend to my Aunt and Uncle's fishing camp.  We are deep in South Louisiana (where the actual Swamp People dwell).  It is hot and sticky outside, barely a breeze.  The kids have been fishing and crabbing all day.  They've had 3 coats of bug spray on them.  In the middle of the day she brought the girls to the only store around for miles.  They came back with each a stuffed animal (grrrrrrr, every mom hates these creatures), each a notepad with several writing tools, sour kool-aid drinks, and each a sour spray candy.  Yes, you read right, SPRAY CANDY!  A sour "candy"  that is sprayed directly in the child's mouth, thereby coating the teeth with a layer of cavity inducing SUGAR!!!   Ugh..I could barely stand it.

Nighttime is here.  We have all had dinner.  It is time to settle down.  I tell the girls to go take their showers as any good mother would.


Then....it happens........the sign of all signs that she has in fact cracked........


She turns to me......as if I'M being unreasonable......a n d   s a y s,


"Adrienne, I hosed them off earlier.  They're fine."


WHAT??????  Who ARE YOU and what have you done with the woman who forced me to try the peas and green beans on my plate?  Where is the woman who demanded baths nightly??  Where is that lady that shielded us from every bad word, bad kid, bad food, bad anything to come our way???

"You hosed them off!!???!!?"

I give up.  She's clearly beyond help at this point.

Lesson:  Being a Nana is a lot more fun than being a mom.  Moms are mean, but Nanas can be absolutely crazy and the kids think they are just cool.

You know what I'm talking about.
~ACZ

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"Fishing"

Location:  Dulac, LA for a fishing vacation
Scene:  a sunshiny afternoon on the fishing pier/boat dock thingy.
Characters:  Catie and Zac

Catie:  Zac, I really, really, really want to fish!!  (insert fake crying face and batting eyelashes)
Zac:  Okay, I'll help you.  Get your fishing pole.
Catie:  Here you go.  (Catie hands her fabulous pink and black Shakespeare to her brother)
Zac:  Okay, come here while I help you cast.  (Both hands on rod.  Both cast the line.)
Catie: (Immediately)  Thanks, Zac.  You hold it there while I go inside for a snack.  (walking away).....Be sure to watch it........don't let go.......Oh, and call for me when you catch MY fish.

Zac sits happily and fishes for Catie.

Lesson:  Catie will not enjoy our fishing vacations for long.

~ACZ